I laughed.
Not because it was funny.
But because I didn’t know what else to do.
That’s how the impact of careless jokes sneaks in.
This was years ago,
something I almost forgot
until I saw it mirrored in others.
What They Said, and Why It Landed
One of my cousins joked about my shaved head:
“You’ve come far away from the women, and you haven’t reached the men yet.”
At first, it didn’t feel like a knife.
Just a laugh to move past.
But looking back, I realise it did cut —
and it stayed with me longer than I expected.
It came back to me years later,
when I watched classmates call a guy “fattie,”
not once,
but every time.
They didn’t just use it as a joke.
They replaced his name with it.
And it wasn’t the only time.
I’ve seen it again and again,
people laughing off jokes that weren’t respectful,
just offensive.
Because here’s the truth:
What people say “as a joke” often reveals how they really feel.
The joke is just the cover.
And I remember thinking,
Excuse me?
The Hidden Cost of Careless Jokes
At the time, I said nothing.
I laughed with them and moved on.
Now, I can even see the humour in it.
But that’s not the same as laughing with affection.
Some jokes feel light because they’re carried with care.
Others land heavy,
even when no harm was meant.
And that difference is everything.
Here’s What I Learned
Sometimes what feels like a harmless laugh lingers instead —
carried like a bruise no one asked for.
It made me think about how much weight words really hold.
How sometimes, caring about what others think isn’t weakness at all.
It’s knowing which voices deserve your attention,
and which ones don’t.
I’m not against jokes.
In fact, I love them.
But careless jokes?
They’re not comedy.
They’re cruelty with a laugh track.
So tell me —
was it really just a joke?